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South African Woman Savagely Beats Up Her Newly Wedded Husband During Love Making On Their Honeymoon Because His D*ck Was Too Big 

  Most men – and their women – would like to have a mean-sized 4-5 to ensure pleasure between the sheets. But Mnombo “Anaconda” Madyibi (32) and his wife want exactly the opposite. That’s because Mnombo’s snake-sized 4-5 is allegedly too big, hairy and scary for his new wife’s kitten! Mnombo got his nickname after his fellow soccer players saw his 4-5 in the change rooms before a soccer match. But his new wife said she’s not being entertained by his bullish 4-5 as it’s destroying her kitten. Mnombo, a local soccer player from Bhongweni Village in Mthatha, allegedly…

Mother Arrested for Begging Her 15­ Year ­Old Daughter to Have a Threesome with Her: ‘We Need the Money’

When your mom’s a ho and she wants you to be one, too… BATON ROUGE, Louisiana – A mentally disturbed mother is charged with indecent behavior with a minor, accused of asking her 15­year­old daughter to have a threesome with her, in exchange for money. Mamie Harris, 39, was arrested after police say Harris approached the teen, asking for her to take part in a three way. The teen refused, to which Harris replied, “You know we need the money.” The teen finally got tired of her mom’s behavior and went to the police. She told police there were…

Crazy Girl Flips Out Text Dude Declines Date 

Hearing how a girl asked a guy out is like someone saying they spotted Bigfoot. It’s really hard to believe but I guess not ENTIRELY impossible. In short, it rarely happens for a girl to take the first step, leaving it up to the guy 99.9% of the time and it’s a breath of fresh air when we don’t have to do all of the damn work. After you read this story, maybe that’s a good thing? This guy was actually asked out by a girl via text and despite it being a sign that the end of days…

Congress Has Authorized Police Officers To Shoot And Kill Suspicious Clowns

Nationwide – After the mysterious nationwide apparition of clowns, a new law has been passed by congress to authorize police officers, to shoot and kill any malicious clown they see alone in the streets. Hundreds of clowns have been appearing across the nation, many of them threatening children and adults, chasing them. Many incidents have been caught on camera and have gone viral on social media. Authorities addressed the situation and assured the public that they were conducting investigations to find out the motive of these clowns. However, it seems that things have gone overboard after it was announced…

Clown Mask To Be Banned In USA; Wearing One Could Cost You A $50,000 Fine

UNITED STATES – Following the scare of random clowns appearing at night and threatening lives, congress has passed a new law in an attempt to put a stop to the madness. Anyone who is caught wearing a clown mask publicly can be charged $50,000 and be jailed for a maximum of 1 year. Authorities are calling these masked individuals “terrorists”. “We don’t know where they come from or what they want” said president Barack Obama, “but they have to be stopped”. Even on Halloween, clown costumes and masks will be prohibited from public wear. “I don’t care who you…

Woman With Too Much Makeup Mistaken As Clown; Attacked By Angry Mob

CHICAGO – Anna Jackson, age 26, resident of the Englewood neighborhood was walking home at around 7 p.m. when she was reportedly attacked by a mob of angry black teenagers upset over the mysterious clown apparitions around the country. After she was beat, the perpetrators realized she wasn’t a clown she was only wearing an excessive amount of makeup. Anna Jackson told authorities she could not identify any of her attackers but she did recall what one of the attackers had said: “Kill this f*cking clown, n*gga think sh*t sweet, this chicago n*gga, I merch that.” Anna Jackson also…

Pastor Making Millions Selling Ciroc Flavored Holy Water to Church Members

“I NEVER MET A NEW YORK PERSON WHO DIDN’T LIKE CIROC ITS JUST SMART BUSINESS.” Said Reverend Sunchain of New York Baptist Church. A New York pastor is making millions of dollars selling Ciroc flavored holy water to members of his church. “YOU CAN THINK YOU’RE GETTING TIPSY, AND THEN WASH AWAY YOUR THOUGHTFUL SINS AT THE SAME TIME” Reverend Sunchain confirmed that even though he makes millions selling his holy water he still makes sure ushers get that collection plate around to every member during Sunday service.

Woman Mistaken As Frightening Clown Shot And Killed At Walmart Parking Lot

OKLAHOMA – A 32 year-old woman identified as Patrica Perez was shot and killed early Tuesday in the parking lot of a Walmart in Oklahoma City, according to police. She was shot by frightened David Bowie who felt Patricia Perez was a mischievous clown breaking into cars. Police say the victim was walking to her car after grocery shopping at her local Walmart when she was shot by David Bowie. A David Bowie pulled out a handgun, shot the victim whom he believed was breaking into cars, police said. After the media frenzy over crazy clowns in his city…

7 Women Posted The Same Man In Celebration Of #Nationalboyfriend Day 

Today in ratchet news! If you didn’t know, yesterday was #nationalboyfriend day and women all over the world were posting cute pics of their boyfriends in celebration of the occasion. Well one guy had an extra special day because 7 different women posted him as their boyfriend and needless to say the posts went viral. Personally, I find the whole thing hilarious, who has time to entertain all that comes with hiding and scheming on 7 different women. People never cease to amaze me!

The 7 Women That Posted the Same Man as Their Boyfriend on ‘National Boyfriend Day’ Finally Speak Out

Yesterday social media went crazy over the fact that seven women posted the same man on Twitter as their boyfriend for “National Boyfriend Day.” Complex magazine decided to reach out to each lady to get the background on their relationship with Twitter user @KINGxCHARLESIII. Complex reports: National Boyfriend Day was Oct. 3, and one boyfriend in particular stole the spotlight after Twitter seemingly caught him sliding into multiple women’s DMs. Seven different women wished the same man a happy day and lots of love. But if it sounds too fantastic to be true… that’s because it is. The seven…
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