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DNA Tests Prove Retired Postman Has Over 1,300 Illegimitate Children

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  Nashville, TN | An 87-year-old former postman has been proven to have fathered over 1,300 illegitimate children after a private investigator hired by a Tennessee family discovered the shocking truth. The investigation that has gathered thousands of DNA samples and testimonies over a 15-year period ultimately proves the man is the father to literally thousands of illegitimate children in the region. “Contraception wasn’t very popular in those days,” he told local reporters in his defense. “I have nothing to be ashamed of. The 60s were the good old days and I did a great Johnny Cash impression which played…

Lesbian Charged with Murdering Man After He Stole Her Girlfriend

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DAMN!! Dallas police have arrested a woman accused of killing a man Tuesday night at a West Dallas apartment complex. Shundale Taylor, 24, was booked early Wednesday on a murder charge in the shooting death of 23-year-old Antoine Hodge, police said. Officers were called about 7:30 p.m. to the Colonia Tepeyac apartments in the 5800 block of Bernal Drive. In the common area, they found Hodge critically wounded. He was taken to Methodist Dallas Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead. Police say Hodge and his associates went to the apartment complex to confront Taylor’s girlfriend over a long-running…

5yr-Old Dying Of Cancer Tells Beyonce She Admires Her for Pretending Jay-Z Isn’t Ugly

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“I WOULD BELIEVE EVERYTHING SHE SAYS ABOUT HIM IN HER SONGS IF I DIDN’T HAVE MY OWN TWO EYES THAT SEE” – KAYLEE Said five year old Kaylee Brownlee about her favorite artist Beyonce. Beyonce visited a five year old dying of cancer as her last wish and was surprised when the little devil in disguise told Beyonce that she admires her for pretending Jay-Z isn’t ugly. “IF SHE TAKES A CHANCE AND HAS ANOTHER KID WITH HIM NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WILL LOOK LIKE. I THINK SHE DESERVES A HUMANITARIAN AWARD OR SOMETHING” – KAYLEE’S MOM Kaylee was…

Florida Man Punches Wife In The Face For Saying He Had A Little D!ck 

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Dominique Flower of St. Petersburg punched his wife in the face after asking if he had a “larger male part then her previous boyfriends,” according to authorities. While the criminal complaint does not include his wife’s answer, it does state that Flower, 30, proceeded to strike her in the face after the question was posed on June 22, which caused her left eye to swell. Flower was charged with domestic battery and appeared in court on June 24 where he was ordered to reside with his brother. According to court records, Flower was only allowed one visit back to…

Detroit Woman Gives Birth To Her 14th Child From 14 Different Fathers

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A 36-year old woman from Michigan has made a crashing entrance into the Guinness Book of World Records yesterday at the Harper University Hospital, by giving birth to her 14th child, all born from different fathers. According to the internationally recognized authority on the cataloguing and verification of world records, Anita Sullivan has just become the first woman in recorded history to conceive children with more than thirteen different men. “I’m extremely proud to have broken a World Record,” Ms. Sullivan told reporters. “My mother always told me that I was lazy and worthless, and that I would never…

Woman Sets Her Husband On Fire For Raping Her 7 Year Old Daughter

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When Vanessa Jackson found that her 52 year old husband, Vincent Phillips, raped and molested her daughter, she took matters into her own hands and lit him on fire. The 40 year old mother waited for her husband to go to bed, then when he was asleep, she poured a combustible liquid on him and lit a match. She then admitted to police that she intentionally set him on fire because shooting him would have been ‘too nice.’ Phillips didn’t die in the blaze and is being charged with a 1st degree sex crime. Jackson faces arson charges and…

President Obama Pardons Big Meech The Head Of The Multi Million Dollar Drug Cartel ‘BMF’ 

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Demetrius Flenory aka “Big Meech,” the head of the multi million dollar drug cartel, Black Mafia Family got a huge break off his 30-year sentence. Two months ago, Demetrius Flenory wrote a two-page letter to president Barack obama, begging the president to pardon him because, most murderers, rapists, and child molesters got much less time than non-violent drug offenders. The punishments don’t fit the crimes when it comes to these drug laws and sentences” Pardon granted by president barack obama Offenses: Drug trafficking, money laundering District: Southern district of florida Terms of Grant: Pardon recipient is granted a full…

Mother Arrested After Tattooing Her Son And Attempting To Trade Him For Drugs 

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A manhunt for 24 year old Shaunetta Wright came to a peaceful end early Monday morning after she was apprehended in Alabama for child abuse, neglect and several other charges. Authorities say that Wright is accused of allowing her boyfriend to etch a full chest tattoo across her two-year-old son’s upper torso and then trading the boy for crack cocaine. According to reports, Wright approach her drug dealer with her son Monday morning around 2:15 AM. The boy was upset, crying and in a lot of pain as she showed off his new ink. Her drug dealer, 34-year-old Tito…

Man Kicked Out Golden Corral After Eating More Than 50LBS Of Food; Sues For $2-million

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SPRINGFIELD,MA – A man from Massachusetts is suing Golden Corral Corporation for 2 million dollars, for false advertising, after being literally thrown out of one of the chain’s restaurants by the employees, last Thursday. According to witnesses, the 51 year old man who lives on welfare, was expelled from the restaurant after he then spent more than 7 hours on-site, ingesting a quantity of food which has been estimated between 50 and 70 pounds. Despite the fact that the restaurant advertised the buffet as “all-you-can-eat”, the manager of the establishment seems to have  lost patience at some point, telling him that his meal would be free but asking him to leave. The manager’s…
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